Photos of One Lost Housemate

Jon Williams Went on Holiday...

2006-10-13T20:07:00.000Z

And came back with a photo for me, which I'm very grateful for. Now usually I don't count photos unless the said person is in the photo, but he's such a nice bloke and good artist (links attached) that i'm letting this one slide.

Anyway I hope you're well, we've just got back
fromBarcelona and I saw this there and got a photo for you: )Cheers and all the
best Jon

http://www.myspace.com/talesofthesidewalk

http://www.createtodestroy.com/main.htm

James' Potty Eyes

2006-10-13T20:03:00.000Z

He's thinks he is funny, under 16's look away now as the whole tone is about to be lowered...

I know no one is in the picture, but i will
swear to the fact that it was taken in Dunedin, New Zealand (eat shit map!) and i think was originally a sign for a uni-sex toilet, its just asking for trouble.
As for Steve, you will have to decide for yourself which one he is... Please
don't ask me what i was doing taking pictures outside toilets or why I keep
sending in pictures of Steve in some form of sexual activity. I'm sure a
psychologist would have a field day with that one. Also after several pints I
came to realise that Steve could be using the alias ST Eve, patron saint of
generic females, and so maybe a wider search would be required. Anyway on with
the gag... James

A Mike Email Special, including Seagull-Man scene.

2006-10-07T13:46:00.000Z

Mickkkkkky writes...

just a few things that I either meant to send to youages ago, or question if they were valid, or I justdid it.The last one I only sent it cos I think it's thesmallest Steve in the world, bearing in mind that thegreen thing is the drip plugged into my vein, it sortof puts the size of the steve into perspective. anyway, I'm going to bed now. So tired, can't evenformulate coherent sentences anymore.nighty night

Two More For Leicester...

2006-10-02T13:38:00.000Z

The Lovely Jo, now arts editor of the demon newspaper and awesomely outrageous former neighbour and all round good guy Rich...

It won't affect the map at all, but both are and were very much appreciated.

Some Recent and no so recent Myspaced photos...

2006-09-21T21:35:00.000Z

On the Tin...

The Map!!!

2006-08-19T21:59:00.000Z

The onelostmap is back at last, here it is, in all its international glory.

Map can also be viewed here...http://www.frappr.com/onelosthousemate

A Man Called Jon

2006-08-11T10:36:00.000Z

Jon got hold of me through the medium of Myspace the other day. Seeming I haven't seen him since the year 2000 I can't really say what he is up to, but he sent me this very nice message.

Hay was perusing myspace after a few drinks and realised i recognised you. I was at clarendon the year above you, dont know if you remember me. But anyways i ran into steve a while back and thought you might like this pic to add to your collection.

http://i22.photobucket.com/albums/b320/jonslator/me-and-steve.jpg

Jon.

No need to use the link, as I have it right here. Thanks Jon, hope to hear from you again soon

James 2...

2006-08-07T19:08:00.000Z

and then I hate you more.

OK so I'm doing this on my friends behalf as he can't be arsed but i think its more than valid
This time Steve is at the top of the worlds highest cable car in Merida, Venezuela....
demonstrating how to do a perfect base jump or something
For record purposes my mates name is Chris
Hope this helps you find him

J

James....

2006-08-07T19:04:00.000Z

You might need help...

heres a post from a while back...

Whilst on one of my more adventurous....erm.....adventures (stupid vocabulary!), I can across Steve himself. Unfortunately it goes against your advice of only taking pictures from Earth and so I am willing to forgo any reward this particular picture might earn me. However for your information Steve was on holiday at the very calm sounding Sea of Tranquility. Id also like to point out that both Steve and I share the ability to breath in Space and that might be why we have magic halo-like-things and no shadows and a number of other things that might make the picture look less genuine than it really is!! James Please do not underestimate just how much spare time I have now thanks to Alan

Bernard....

2006-08-07T18:59:00.000Z

Just incase you all missed it, or more likely I missed it, here it is again,

Well, I think I may have found Steve. He was here all the time on Holiday in Sunny Hunny with his family. Photo taken on 3 June 2006 on the Promenade at Hunstanton.
Best Wishes
Bernard Beckett
from Wisbech

Can you help This man...

2006-08-07T18:54:00.000Z

Amin Al-Sharani sends me this highly important letter...

ï»¿
My name is Mr. Amin Al-Sharani from Dubai (United Arab Emirate). I am a
merchant here in Dubai dealing in Ornamentals, Oriental Carpets and
Artifacts and life was very smooth for me until about three(3) years
ago when I was first diagnosed of Cancer of the Larynx.
Before I
became ill, I deposited twenty four million dollars($24,000 000.OO) in
a long-term deposit vault of a security/finance company in Europe and I
didn`t state any new TRUSTEE / BENEFICIARY after the lost of my entire
family when the money was deposited and if I died without stating any
the money will automatically go into the coffers of the security
company and I don`t want this to happen. I have left the hospital and
presently receiving treatment in an acupuncture clinic, I have been
undergoing treatment for Oesophageal Cancer at the hospital. I have
since lost my ability to talk clearly and my doctors have told me that
I have only a few months to live. It is my last wish to see this money
disburse to charity organizations and victims of natural disasters.
Please, I beg you in the name of God to help me process these deposit
and disburse it amongst charity organizations. Meanwhile I have set
aside 30% for you for your time and patience.
Remain blessed,
Amin Al-
Sharani

Remain blessed I shall, Mr Sharani, put together in this photo fit, right, wants your money, and he's going to kill you.

Spread the Joy!!!!

2006-08-07T18:49:00.000Z

Onelosthousemate is back and now it is time to update the whole world on all the lovely things that are happening. Expect a fully updated map as soon as i can be arsed, possibly with super duper google earth attachment but maybe not...

Here is Latvian Kat, as she shall now been known, hustling women for a look of their own piss, at least I know what she gets up to at the pub now...

Kat Writes...

in Amsterdam they teach girls to use the loo... hmmmmm..

AT LAST...

2006-06-06T21:30:00.000Z

Ok so things have been very quiet for a while, there hasn't been alot coming in, and in fairness there has not been alot going out (cue trip to Germany) but Here I give you the one photo that really matter. The one photo in which now the Becketts can hold their collective heads up high and say YES! We are the first onelostfamily.

and in true Noel Edmonds style (because I can't get hotmail to work)

I KNOW YOU'LL BE BACK... to see a photo of Bernard Beckett the man who made it all worthwhile

Just The Ticket...

2006-06-01T11:08:00.000Z

Ticket
Originally uploaded by onelosthousemate.

Is it me or is this Steve carrying a ticket larger than his head. The picture would just look ridiculous if he could fit that in his pocket

onelosthousemate keyrings...

2006-05-23T11:54:00.000Z

Are now for sale. Contact me at onelosthousemate@hotmail.co.uk

Kat is a liar...

2006-05-21T20:24:00.000Z

Cos this is not her in the photo.

Phil, Phil, Phil...

2006-05-21T20:16:00.000Z

I need your head in ur entrant. Now I know your probably a wizz at photoshop so get working, this is my effort. Spot the original, and the phil hiding behind the poll.

Phil Wrote..."I think I might have seen Steve while i was in LA, but i'm not sure.

Philip"

Phil has a cool blog at http://www.philipbrown77.blogspot.com/

Strangeness is next to godliness (if god is into weird people)

2006-05-21T19:56:00.000Z

Getting alot of strange unchartered mail recently. Some people will know I have been collecting photos of heads. But this isn't the strange mail, thank you by the way to all taking part so far, but I still need more.

Anyway here is a general overview of everything

Darius asks... "How well do you know Daz?" I might not know alot, but by the title of your email, I know you talk about yourself in the third person, so you might be a wrestler.

Helen sent me a hello... Helen, Hello.

The G-lock simply asks... "Who are you?" well if only he asked me two more times he would have found an answer, yes I am Mustafa, and I will be killing you now.

Helen sent me a hello... Helen, Hello.

In reply to my postcard selling Tom said... "probably should have sent that as html" / maybe but you should have bought one of my postcards.

Zoe sent me "Its a postcard of kent!! i think i want the one of the cat with no tail though!! how are you babe? I havent seen you for yonks! much love zoe xxx" - Zoe never received the cat with no tail, as she didn't put the 99p where her mouth was. Since April 20th I have seen Zoe, so one out of two isn't bad.

Karl, the original blackmen in cardigans hunter sent me a helpful ebay hint. Cheers buddy.

Tash, as ever is sending me info on bands and chaps i've never heard of. I will listen to them all in time I promise.

"becca hates you all" - thats her name, she keeps sending me blank emails asking me if it will work, and lists of birthdays, crazy lady.

Someone sent me a very random email asking me to check there new profile. There was a water shortage and a flock of seagulls - i don't know why i've quoted austin powers twice in this blog maybe i'm just groovy baby.

Alesha says... "well hello there well i havent really talked tpo in like forever but hello9 and also how did you get my e-mail? besides msn and myspace......" you have answered your own question, when you add me to your msn, I get your email address added to my list of contacts, then I send you news of all my goings on.

Darius again asks me What Erotic Fantasy Is Matched to Your Personality? - well i'd have to say this would probably be receiving loads of onelosthousemate entries to my emails rather then tat, whilst at the same time making love to a beautiful lady. Failing that just listening to the infadels will do.

Katja, doesn't quite get what an entrant is.

On top of this numerous people asking me to join their bebo, sharing photos with a lady Jane, do I like the same films as Zoe, whos my ideal partner, and how well do I know Jenfa

So there you are, you all got a mention

Alan finds what he's looking for...

2006-05-21T19:49:00.000Z

ontop of peoples heads.

Take a look, see if you can find that illusive Steve.

Alan Writes... (believe it or not, yes he does)

"Dear one lost housemate

I have found Steve again. This time he was hovering above the door in hogshead looking like he was trying to run away. Not sure whether this should be counted as my entry or your second or paddys first. But here are the pictures anyway.

Thank you

Alan"

Sophie sent me an email...

2006-05-01T07:22:00.000Z

Which seems to imply what she will do to me if I carry on emailing her and her mother, still if it does happen it will be nice to see her again.

She wrote of this beautiful Steve creation...

Hi ****,

I am so sorry.

This is how I found him after a night down ESC and he was in a bad way.

The good news is, he is recovering and should be back to his old self in no time.

Sofi Jo

x x x

A plea to take part...

2006-04-27T09:47:00.000Z

Go to ebay...type in "onelosthousemate" or item number 7408956832 and you will see you can join the project by buying a postcard.

Here for you lazyitis people is the description.

onelosthousemate is offering you the buyer the rare oppotunity to liberate a postcard, and fulfil its destiny.
This postcard was especially chosen from the charity shop collection, and if you the lucky bidder should win this postcard then not only will you own an original onelosthousemate scripture, but as stated you will of fulfiled an old postcards destiny.Content of writing can be requested, as could an address...

but it should be noted that on the event of you winning the postcard you have made a gentlemens agreement to liberate another postcard.

One which you must venture to find, struggle with the authorities to liberate, and then finally party the night away as you send someone the card and fulfilling its destiny.

Upon winning the postcard you will also become part of a special art project blog, and will be notified of its whereabouts.Happy Bidding,onelosthousemate.

PS. There are 27 different postcards, photo is just an example, I even have one of a strange cat with no tail.i wanted to make each card 20p but ebay won't let me... if this makes you angry, i'll quite happily make you happy sometime further in the future, via the gift of something random and unexpected.

Now all i have to do is spread the word

At last, Stu, Charlie and Ian's photos....

2006-04-20T20:15:00.000Z

Heres something i posted on myspace.

2006-04-08T07:08:00.000Z

Here is a mention to some lovely people I have met since onelosthousemate started...
http://www.myspace.com/louisee --- Louise is head honcho of midlands based Musicalness Teapot media, everyone there is very cool, and I won 4 tins of bob the builder shaped spaghetti.
http://www.myspace.com/tiernanwelch --- ok so I have only really met Tiernan before the actual onelostevent, but to my knowledge he was the only man to find and respond to the 40 odd xmas cards I posted around Leicester.
http://www.myspace.com/head_heart_hips_and_lips --- Tash is the Leicester Local music guru, loving all things infadels. She is also a onelostfollower... NB still awaiting an entrant.
http://www.myspace.com/iancollins --- Ian works at my pub, he's a strange lad but went to the effort of making a steve comic.
http://www.myspace.com/headtofail --- Hannah was the first ever onelostentrant that I didn't actually know.
http://www.myspace.com/ityftf --- From parts unknown ITYFTF is a free fanzine found in music shops whenever he can be arsed to make a new one. A receiver of a onelostletter who I later met at a Chalets gig. Nice Bloke too.
http://www.myspace.com/_redz --- Redz is my favourite man in the world, I want to grow up (a bit more) and be just like him, if it were war i'd be by his side. Redz is a roadie for the infadels, was nice enough to take some flyers on tour with him... he is cool.
http://www.myspace.com/kathymcq --- Kathy was the only person to respond to the call for oneloststickers, although I haven't heard from her since, so I'm guessing she didn't like them.
http://www.myspace.com/richardpeel --- Richard Peel makes awesome comics, he also has a wife.
http://www.myspace.com/lucy_peel --- Lucy is the wife of said Peel, and likes Bryan Adams.
http://www.myspace.com/jamie_taete_ --- Jamie got in contact with me ages ago, but I can't remember why. He is an awesome photographer. If you do one thing today, wash, if you do two, take the time to look at some of his work.
http://www.myspace.com/natalalaa --- Natalie was the first to post an 'entrant' on my profile. We talk mostly when she has work to hand in, as she'll do anything but what she's supposed to be doing. She is also loving Deal or no deal.
http://www.myspace.com/slideshowonline --- ok so I haven't met these people, but I would if I could.
http://www.myspace.com/teapotmedia --- My mates teapot media.
http://www.myspace.com/cheapshotfanzine --- Cheapshot fanzine are a twosome who like Morrissey, BLEUGH!

Reaction, An Idea, and Ian's Floating Sign.

2006-03-29T11:26:00.000Z

Mr Fassam has become an innovator of sorts...

Are these photos reason enough to start a 'text me a steve' service???

Or will I just get a load of nutters...

anyhow Mr Fassam's first message read,

Hey, I have been named, and I feel shamed. So heres Charlie with a disabled steve.

This however means Charlie has now entered, and I was about to inform Stuart, when this happened...

And here is steve trying and failing 2 get away from me. This will be the 1^st of many steve pics as I want the world to see your breast, though without being rude 2 either of you I think you’d get a better response if u offered 2 show the world nics breasts. Just a thought. Stu

Nicola is currently serving 3 weeks for hunting down Stuart...

So if this wasn't enough phone banter Mr Collins got in on the act as well, however without any words we can only assume this to be some sort of paranormal steve in his room.

and now the photos won't load... Drat, and double drat.

Bah... Rain... but is it normal rain...

2006-03-29T11:21:00.000Z

James has decided that Bueno Aires is not enough and writes...

John,

Think I spotted Steve crossing the road in...... wait for it.....
Manama (or Manamana do do dodo do, depending on if you're insane or
not) Bahrain.  Just outside the main square to be exact.

I can only assume Steve is a dedicated F1 fan, either that or he was
looking for a pearl necklace for his loved one.  Bahrain, of course,
being a world leader in pearl exportation.

Hope this helps and apologies for what this might do for the world
sightings map.

James

Well at this rate I might as well just give James the prizes,

pack my bags and become his personal Steve trainer

Thanks for the entry... the more the merrier, earth photos only please

You can do it... Put your ass into it!

2006-03-11T10:45:00.000Z

All things onelosthousemate has been fairly dormant for a while now. This is mainly due to two things

1. I am constantly tired of working my ass off and therefore all this takes a unwanted backseat, when I should be talking to people, and getting them doing the onelosthousemate business.

2. People who I talk to about the onelosthousemate business to still won't enter.

So in keeping with Coupling humour I am making you a promise, if we can get to over 25 entries by April, I John Kirby promise to show you a breast...

So start getting your friends involved, tell your friends, badger me for flyers, stickers and the like... get your entry in, because you never know when it could be all over.

Also on a related note I will now be naming and shaming friends who have not entered.

Alan's Dad... your whole family has entered, its about time you gave in to temptation and joined them.

Alex... Stop playing with your car with LED lights, take five minutes out to send me a onelosthousemate entry and I promise you'll be a hit with the ladies.

Amy and Tony... you could be the first onelostcouple.

Andrea... you even have onelostartwork adorning your walls, it is time you joined the revolution.

Anne-Marie... I can't remember if I told you about onelosthousemate, but you're so clever you should know already.

Chris... It might be a better option than telling a lady you were trying to guess the size of her nipples.

EVERYONE AT THE CITY GALLERY... Pull your finger out and get entering, think of the prestige, plus i'll let you book me for an exhibition for free.

Emma and Richard, Richard and Emma... baby on the way but thats no reason to ignore the youngest in the family for the next 6 months, on a trip to those weird breathing classes get photographing.

EVERYONE AT THE LEICESTER GATEWAY... you disapoint me, you were there at the beginning, and you're mostly students, you have the time, but do you have the power?

Helen... I never see you anymore, but you're one of the more photogenic friends (no offence) you could be the smiling face of onelosthousemate.

Ian... Stop harrassing the ladies and start making me happy.

Joanne... Its time to get your head out of the books and start entering onelosthousemate. James, you should know better.

Jo Leese... stop hiding behind the demon newspaper, where is the double page poster interview I so richly deserve.

Julia... I know your not shy infront of a camera, after all i've seen the photos of you and your friends dressed up as devils and angels, so be an angel and get me a onelosthousemate photo.

Kari... Just do it.

Laura... I know you don't have a camera, or any such equipment to send a photo or even look at this, but who says you shouldn't be at least trying.

Likki... where are you when i need you most.

Martina... (see Julia, minus the dressing up bit)

Mona-Lisa... the busiest of all the non enterers, maybe a onelostworkshop is in the offing?

Nicole... you've been to canada and africa, you could have it in the bag already.

Paddy... The enthusiasm is within you, you just need the application to put off an episode of 24 for ONE night.

Pete... put down your Kite and pick up a steve.

Phil... Do you even know about this...

Sofi... the photo of the bison wasn't enough, please help.

Stu... mate, buddy, old chum... I'll snare you at the stag day... and everyone else.

Tash... you have a big shiney camera, you even wrote a bit about onelosthousemate, join us.

Teapot media... you promoted the awesomeness of onelosthousemate, but how can you know the true power of it without becoming part of it.

Shaun... Where are my Prague photos??? Hmm. Hmm. Naughty boy.

Have I missed anyone out?

love

onelosthousemate.

Have a ganders at what you could win (so far)

2006-02-26T14:52:00.000Z

Here is every prize for you to view so far... all these prizes will eventually be shown on www.lettersofonelosthousemate.blogspot.com , but its a pain in the bottom scanning every letter I send!

onelosthousemate

Two brand spanking new onelosthousematers...

2006-02-20T19:54:00.000Z

Millie Reed, first photo. Becky McChrystal, second photo.
The toilets in the Shires.
I'm curious.. what's this whole thing about??
XD
So yes two more entrants after last nights debacle with b3ta... to which I can only say... in their face, and whilst we're at it one more time, I hate vodka women (from revolution, not russians in general). So thank you Millie and Becky, I am about to tell you what its all about...

Take the rough with the smooth...

2006-02-19T23:14:00.000Z

Well tonight I learnt something quite valuable. I don't normally rant about anything negative... not since the vodka girls infact... but I put the flyer on b3ta.com tonight thinking people might actually be interested in taking part, or at least reading bits or whatever, but didn't really consider getting abuse back.

So I am now shopping b3twats.

and here they are...

If you know these people, you're one of the rare ones because they usually spend 15 hours a day on messageboards thinking they're witty, rather than surfboard hugging recluses. Cheers for the negativity, but come up with something a little more orignial, like this guy... I actually think this is very funny.

So I guess this is still classed as spam now? Goodbye b3ta, and anyone mildly nice who used it, I will view you no more (apart from when i want to see together in electric dreams)

Goodafternoon, and welcome to the hunt for person 1000.

2006-02-19T22:09:00.000Z

You may or may not know, but if you were/are the 1000th person to look at this site. you are a winner.

You have won exclusive onelosthousemate artwork... all you need is some proof like a screen print.

I can also check this information however, and if the person doesnt come forward, i'll need some help tracking down the right person with IP addresses and what not, can anyone help.

It is very important that this is forfilled.

onelosthousemate... project 1000 soon to be project 2000

A Few Honourable Mentions...

2006-02-09T19:53:00.000Z

Taken from www.myspace.com/sodje the official onelosthousemate profile.

Tash

12/16/2005 5:55 AM

Aaaaaaah, now it makes, I was wondering who this “Steve” guy you’d been mentioning on your profile was? Now I know it’s the bloke on all the signs (rolls eyes) has anyone took you up on the offer of posing with Steve & sending you the photo?

goof ball©

1/4/2006 8:21 AM

haha omg i love it! i will look out for steve for you. I'm sure i'v seen him somewhere before??? haha!! how r u?
loves xoxo

BubbleWrap Man

1/5/2006 12:09 PM

i can't find steve anywhere its like hes 1 of them changin colour lizards...

Kathy

1/5/2006 1:08 PM

Hello!
I'm searching high and low for Steve, no SIGN of him yet...:(
Checking out Squires Charles and Davids portal now, thanks for the tip-off on their whereabouts.
And, "How Does It Feel To Be A Morrissey Wronger?" ;) Please let me know!

Kathy

Fudge

1/12/2006 3:06 PM

ive taken a photo of me with your lost housemate, ill send it as soon as i have it :P

Hails_storm

1/24/2006 2:52 PM

i duno if its just me but i think steves slightly mean, everytime i pass him he just stares at me blankly, like hes expressionless. i dont know him personally but i think its slightly bitchy.
when u find him can u tell him what ive said, maybe he doesnt know hes doin it but im startin to get offended now.
cheers for the add.
Hails .x

~LoveYouMore~

1/30/2006 10:28 AM

I Found Steve's Family Album in Ikea, but not Steve :(

Back to the good stuff...

2006-02-09T07:06:00.000Z

Hi Mate

Matty Patatty Cardozo sends his greetings! And wishes to offer up his kamikazee steve as evdence.

Heeyaa!

ONE... LOST.... Gallery...

2006-02-01T18:17:00.000Z

Just to let everyone know that a new spangly and shiny gallery is opening in Leicester, where onelosthousemate will be helping out most hopefully on a regular basis, this alone should be reason enough to come in, look around and spend some serious coin, but alas we have some great artists work there as well.

Today I saw Lucy Stevens work sitting in there... see http://www.lucystevens.co.uk/

and also some Helen Kenworthy work...

add to that, the downstairs is already tarted up with artwork from Head honcho and allround good guy MLC, plus Bella Culley (hope i've spelt that right)

We're also hoping to get work in from the cream of leicesters err crop. So hopefully we will be hearing from you soon!

here is a delightful flyer, just so u can burn it into your retina's to remember.

Just One Onelosthousemate - Give It To Me!

2006-01-27T00:04:00.000Z

Is my plea!

Myspace... and a reminder.

2006-01-25T20:03:00.000Z

As myspace hits its 700th view I thought i'd take the time to thank everyone who has read the plight of the search for Steve the onelosthousemate so far.

Its great that so many of you are being curious, and actively taking the time to look at these things.

Thank you for all the lovely comments left so far, but all the photos left in them cannot count as entries, no matter how good they are, as the rules state, entries can only be taken through the email address.

That doesn't mean stop commenting by the way, comment away...

For all you who do not know what the hell I am talking about go to www.myspace.com/sodje to see the world of onelosthousemate within the world of myspace.

Happy hunting

onelosthousemate.

The new flyers have arrived!!!!

2006-01-22T19:23:00.000Z

and here it is!

Felt up and double teamed...

2006-01-22T19:14:00.000Z

The double team of Sarah and Andy that is, who had there photo taken with Steve in one of Leicester's more beautiful areas.

Andy writes...

one of me
one of sarah
and one of sarah stroking steves backside....mmmmmmm
(note the workmen)

Excellent work... thanks very much... These photos should as well be noted with the fact that it was taken with Andy's new christmas camera, which i can only assume he wanted so much so he can go travelling looking for onelosthousemate all over the world!

Myspace does its job...

2006-01-22T19:03:00.000Z

Well almost...

Since the dawn of time (around november) i've been putting more effort into myspace then flyering to try and get more people interested and get some more photos coming in

Natalie from Middlesex doesn't have magical digital camera... but she does have the powers of a search engine so for that we should let the world see her findings... and email

thanks Natalie.

I've been a bit silly and just posted these on your myspace as comments because Steve told me to. I should have known not to listen.

He also told me to attach these but I can't actually see them - I hope you can.

The first is of Steve being power-hungry; he really seems to love having a sense of control and seemed to feel more authoritative in costume. Don't know what he used to be like...

The second is the aftermath - he became so arrogant that he started being 'ironic'. Not funny.

And I'm afraid he wouldn't let me pose with him in either of the photos, so self-obsessed and egotistical these days it's actually ridiculous. The boy needs a good come down.

Well he sends his love anyway, with much requisite sarcasm.

P.S. I am Natalie from myspace

xxx and x from Steve

Two quick thoughts...

2006-01-10T16:47:00.000Z

If that is what Turismo is in Beuno Aires... then what the hell is Gran Turismo on the Playstation...

oh and i'm sure i've seen a variation of his steve entry.

Manchester With Mick

2006-01-10T16:45:00.000Z

Beuno Aires...

2006-01-10T16:43:00.000Z

Mr Whitby is there with Steve, and a visitor

You wait a month or two and then two come along at once

2006-01-10T16:25:00.000Z

and even that headline should probably read three unless James Whitby is a cunning master of disguises, as I am pretty sure 4 of the photos are of fellow housemate Mickkkkkky, who you might know from such famous polls as the nice or nasty poll.

such was the sheer bulk of the email that it had to be sent in two parts, the first of which with accompanying photos which just read

I've seen your housemate.... doing some crazy things all over the world

and then short moments later another email attached reading...

Sorry I've just realised that there is absolutely no explanation to go
with the pictures of your housemate... How are you supposed to find
him if I dont tell you where I've seen him?..

So The first four, as demonstrated by my glamorous assistant are from
Manchester. The last I find in Beunos Aires, he gets around! Anyway
you'll be pleased to hear that Steve is well and enjoying some of the
local activities.....but has definitely been labeled a tourist
(tourismo)

Good luck with tracking him down

james
xxx

So Beuno Aires... really. Well when I get the map back off my other computer i'm going to have fun adding that aren't I? At least Mickkkkkky had the decency to keep it in the UK...

No I'm only joking (badly) this is a momentous occassion and should be accompanied by 20th century fanfare music. Our first losthousemate abroad, so maybe now even the man from India who found my blog searching Turkmenistani Girls (which I had used to describe revolution women) will be tempted into finding a onelosthousemate steve and send it to me at the address onelosthousemate@hotmail.co.uk or onelosthousemate@hotmail.com

thank you James and Mickkkkkky for your efforts. I make that 13 entrants now and ever rising.

Keep them coming.

A new entrant...

2006-01-08T13:40:00.000Z

Comes by the name of Hannah with a photo of herself with Steve on her head.

At 13:27:34 on the 07 January 2006 Hannah became the first person I don't personally know (at least I hope I don't otherwise that statement could be embarassing... but if I do meet her I will surely give her a big thank you) to enter onelosthousemate, and for that I SALUTE YOU.

She wrote with her entrant...

Steve on my head. =(

xxhannahxxx

So not alot to go on, but what can we gain from the information given to us by this mysterious Hannah person.

Well evidently Steve is on her head, but see how she has a frowning face after that. She either doesn't like steve at all, making this some kind of exhibit photo of authority figures, or she merely would prefer steve to be in better places than her head, like at road works or helping people cross the road.

I would also note that she is arty, or at the least likes art because she has art on the wall, although i wouldn't know what conclusions to make about a black sofa or a large cushion.

Whatever kind of person you are Hannah, thank you for taking the time and effort to enter onelosthousemate, you are one of the magical few.

Which is why I should be adding entrants are still wanted at onelosthousemate@hotmail.co.uk OR onelosthousemate@hotmail.com

Calling Canada.

2006-01-05T14:47:00.000Z

Are you canadian?

Are you apt to spend over two hours on one weblog?

Are you from or near Edmonton Alberta?

Are you canadian?

3rd January 2006 one canadian decided to spend 2 hours 19 minutes and 44 seconds on this blog... who are you? have you got a photo you want to enter? who are you?

Its all very confusing. So canadians, Thanetians, everyone... why not leave a comment on who you are, why your hear and where your from.

Always looking for new photos

onelosthousemate

Ever been handed something really weird?

2006-01-05T14:42:00.000Z

Well if you're the proud owner of a onelosthousemate flyer then the answer is probably yes. The same happened to me the other day when a strangely posh looking lady handed me on of these flyers...

Now not realising this had a back to it, as most flyers don't I couldn't help but feel I was walking east, so i'd probably end up on the norfolk broads or Great Yarmouth, I'd go further but I can't swim.

thank god there is no confusion over having your photo with steve, sending it to me and then me putting it into my blog.

Found - onelostdog

2006-01-03T18:32:00.000Z

New years day I had the pleasure of finding the nuttiest dog in all of canterbury. His name was Dingo and he was for around 2 hours my onelostdog. If anyone is reading this in Canterbury has lost this dog, please contact canterbury police, and then send me all your money for a reward. Dingo was awesome, attacking washing lines and sniffing anything.

With this I officially name Dingo the Canterbury dog the first ever onelostdog. Dingo I salute you, and all puppies you father.

Voting is up... but just for fun (or is it)

2005-12-21T12:36:00.000Z

Just to let you know that voting can now be done hopefully in the colomn on the right of this (though it has been known to linger at the bottom of the page.)

in other news Andrew Magee has become the first person to officially endorse everything onelosthousemate. If you want to, simply send me a photo of urself with the same scrall on it, apart from change your name, and you will feature here! HURRAH!

Hello Andrew, thanks again for the photos!

A Promise Kept, and a clue...

2005-12-16T12:26:00.000Z

Here is my beautiful girlfriend in all her glory... I wonder how many hits i'll get off google for writing that...

anyway she writes...

Here is my long-awaited entry for onelosthousemate...

It is a beautiful picture of Steve crouching to clean up his dog's poo. I think we could all learn from Steve's actions.

I apologise for the time it has taken me to enter, but I have been very busy banging my head against a wall after every shift working at the pub.

Hope the photo is of use to you, don't take Steve for granted - you never know when he won't be around to guide you.

Nic.xx

Quite. Thank you my lovely... There are now over 10 entrants, which is amazing!

Alans Sister Sandra

2005-12-16T12:15:00.000Z

Hopes this makes you all smile!! and that the prizes have got better!!

Alan's sister Sandra

YES it has made me smile... all of me!

Onelosthousemate launches Project 1000

2005-12-10T12:26:00.000Z

Project 1000 has been launched.

All you have to do is be the 1000th person to visit this blog, get evidence that you are indeed the 1000th person (via photo or the print screen button is best) and send it to me.

You will be given a free onelosthousemate artwork. Lets not forget these bad boys both sold at The City Gallery and won prizes so this is no rubbish prize.

So, be 1000, get evidence, win prize. Simple. Unless some random Turkmenistani looks on it and claims the prize.

All my love

onelosthousemate

www.photosofonelosthousemate.blogspot.com

www.lettersofonelosthousemate.blogspot.com

Braintree has its moments

2005-12-09T11:52:00.000Z

Like finding the biggest steve sign ever outside a service station. I have written to Yorkie, although to this date it isnt noted on my letters site, so this was a bit like me making second contact. Yorkie if your listening i'm waiting for you to get back to me.

Shaun et al joins the party...

2005-12-06T21:34:00.000Z

Here is Shaun with his friends, can you spot both Steves?

Shaun writes...

Get down with your homies big man...

looking through some old pics i spotted an upsidedown
steve...

how long has the poor lad been missing????

your bud

picto

Arise Sir Tone...

2005-12-06T21:30:00.000Z

Who is slowly becoming Mr onelosthousemate

this is him (apparently) and people who know him will question is that really his hair/umbrella/jumper.

I believe him to be a liar and a cheat, but there we go. This is his entry, enjoy.

Why bother entering, when someone can enter you for you.

2005-12-06T21:25:00.000Z

I have become my own enterer, via the gift of Joanne,

thanks for the photo. and obviously, keep the entrys entering.

mr onelosthousemate.

What do you do when you get drunk emails???

2005-12-05T14:21:00.000Z

Naturally you embrace whoever is sending you these emails as he still remains a minorty of person who actually keeps his word to email in, even if it isn't with the desired onelosthousemate image.

So here is the emailed story of Tony, who you may remember from such famous photos as the disgust of littering revolution ladettes.

31 October 2005 01:45:20

hello john k,how are you mate, just thought i would email u and
say...why...hello
there.

love tony

and then moments later...

31 October 2005 02:13:49

this must win i hope

and then you might think that would be the end of things but alas a week later around the same time this happens.

06 November 2005 02:28:03 - spanish cheescakes arent as good as us

enjoy the wierd ad the more more wierd, im drunk,sin city j alba, shes rather
stimulating.the hoff, wooooo

and cue a barage of photo/imageness...

Are we dealing with a man obsessed? with the Hass? which is your favourite Tony the showpony image, and will the sacred onelosthousemate email address ever be the same again

stay tuned, (and thanks Tony)

(and guess what now the photos you sent in won't work)

Find a onelostbargain....

2005-12-01T13:56:00.000Z

This weekend at the 27a art fair in Leicester between the hours of 2 and 4pm you may just be able to find a onelostbargain. All money goes to 27a which is a lovely arts space for workshops so please give kindly.

and i should not forget

2005-12-01T12:21:00.000Z

My favourite photo of all time, not some lady wrapped up in a fire blanket, but my girlfriend stealing the covers from me at night.

A Phone with a view

2005-12-01T12:14:00.000Z

Just thought i would post a few photos that I have taken recently with my phone or had sent to me.

They all have their own little story, and not all entirely relevent to the onelosthousemate cause, but it goes to show what you can find when you open your eyes.

Proof... entering photos online is easy!

2005-11-28T20:02:00.000Z

So have you ever felt the need to take a photo of yourself with soup on your head and send it to people who you have never met before in your life, and probably never will? No, well I did, and so did around 180 other people all in tribute to the great Soupy George song, accessable via www.rathergood.com (not that they need the advertising anyway!)

See its that easy to enter something so completely random, so I wonder why I struggle with my entrants, maybe i need a song!

Anyway, cheek out the soupy legions at....

http://www.flickr.com/photos/tags/souponyourhead/

and see it as your duty to join them. (and me)

The British Journal of Photography.

2005-11-27T16:55:00.000Z

These people for all of you to know are not very clever.

If you go on their site, there is a bit where you can send in enquiries. So naturally I did, because getting onelosthousemate in there would be awesome.

Anyway so I sent them a nice email asking for prices and if they would be nice enough give me something for nothing

Fotoulla Michael... if that is your real name, this was your reply...

Dear John Kirby

Thank you for requesting media information for the British Journal of
Photography.

If you have any questions at all, please don't hesitate to contact me either by
replying to this email or on tel. +44 (0)20 7484 9949.

Thank you again for your interest in BJP.

Best regards,

Fotoulla Michael
Advertisement Manager
British Journal of Photography
Email: mailto:fotoulla.michael@incisivemedia.com
Tel: +44 (0)207 484 9818

Now that really doesn't help does it!

Mylostspace

2005-11-27T16:51:00.000Z

Had a lovely invitation to join myspace... I can't find out who you are, but please let yourself be known.

For all of you in the myspace world, or not my link to their site is...

http://www.myspace.com/sodje

enjoy

A sixth entrant or a re-entry

2005-11-27T16:32:00.000Z

So here we are again, about a month behind, and thanks again to Karl for his entrant, is it better than the previous one he sent in??

Either way, its a new Steve I have never seen before, and a very nice photo. Karl writes...

libarians are still after me!

steve is my only friend.

guess where i'm going to stick my index finger next?

look how happy we are together!

quite.... and here he is.

and the beat goes on...

2005-11-23T17:14:00.000Z

So yes here I am again telling everyone everything will be running again soon and smoothly.

"People... everything will be running again soon and smoothly"

Now having processor problems, but let it be known, after this there will be no more PC problems

In the meantime put on your art detectives hats and try and see what else i've been up to recently.

Ta ta. Onelosthousemate

Good news...

2005-11-14T11:23:00.000Z

As of www.lettersofonelosthousemate.blogspot.com

have a nice day

onelosthousemate

Updates... an apology

2005-11-04T21:08:00.000Z

Hello there, long time no blog and i must apologise.

After telling the world of all the lovely people who were viewers of the website my graphics card exploded into a million fragments and as of now am using the onelostbackuplaptop, christ that sounds like a inspector gadget tool.

anyhow, until my PC heals blog updates will be at a minimum as i am seriously lacking in the resources department.

To keep you all happy, why not start at the beginning and read it all again so far, or why not go out right now and get your entrant in, and become entrant 6... yes 6

also rejoice in the knowledge that I am now getting lots of cool stuff through the post.

Or rejoice further that any of you with a sticker, now own an official artwork, as I had two onelosthousemate artworks accepted to the open exhibition in leicester and can view them as of next next saturday.

Thank you all so far for your time, effort and so on, I promise as soon as all is sorted, onelosthousemate will be back and more concentrated.

until then, i'm making shot glasses, desk tidys and t-shirts... email me if you're interested in all of it or bits of it.

Keep photos, feel obliged to send me anything, must keep it all going

I LOVE YOU ALL

onelostcompuerlesshousemate

Onelosthousemate would like to say hello to...

2005-10-28T09:04:00.000Z

Viewers and readers from around the world, confirmed from the following places...

Marrakech (my favourite of the entire lot!)
Seattle
San Antonio
Providence, Rhode Island
Danderyd, Stockholm
Kuwait, Al Kuwayt
New Delhi
Phoenix, Arizona
Kuala Lumpur
Bergen, Hordaland (Norway)
Duxbury Massachusetts
Cincinnati Ohio

I love you all, as well as the people from Maidstone, Scotland, DeMontfort University, EVERYONE... HAVE A VERY NICE DAY!

onelosthousemate

Just a reminder.

2005-10-27T16:41:00.000Z

Just a quick reminder to everyone that this page is related to my photos page at www.lettersofonelosthousemate.blogspot.com

Anyone wishing to write anything about the sites, good or bad is more than welcome, but please point me in the direction of where I can find it! Who knows, if your nice, i'll probably put a bit about you here too, or write you a letter.

Please keep sending photo entrants, leaving comments and all sorts, anything for me to do.

have a nice day

John.

2005-10-27T16:10:00.000Z

Last saturday thought i'd see for myself in the lovely city of Leicester how easy it was to pick up a steve onelosthousemate photo. Now i couldn't line myself up to be in the photos so none really count but here are 5 of the 15 that i managed to find. Keep an eye out for the bottom one featuring a terrorist, michael Jackson, Craig David and the scary man from Sin City.

Onelosthousemateness can get you just about anywhere...

2005-10-27T16:04:00.000Z

Including Halloween parties....

Half a Family of Entrants...

2005-10-27T15:55:00.000Z

So firstly I get this email in my inbox, simply titled "Steve", just so I know its an entrant. Its a good job as well it was taken where it was taken, and that there was a name on the email because nothing was in the email apart from the photo....

So with that, a big thank you to Linda of Wisbech presumably, who becomes the 3rd entrant to the onelosthousemate quest.

Then later that evening I bag the son as well, and fellow housemate, Alan.

Alans email reads...

Dear onelosthousemate

Having seen your flyer I went on a mission to find steve and I think I may have succeeded.

I found him less than half a mile from my house on Elm High Road in Wisbech

Please let me win

Thanks

Alan Beckett

and here too is the young lads entrant, entrant number four, Alan... thank you.

I am now on a roll, and that is a fact that cannot be denied.

Other responses to onelosthousemate include...

2005-10-24T15:29:00.000Z

Other than Mr Karl, who entered the oneloststakes for the grand prize, there were two other replies to the first ever newsletter.

This email was from a good friend of mine called Jo, who does lots of lovely helpful work at DMU.

She wrote....

To re-iterate.... you are a nutter...albeit a lovely nutter...

which in all fairness is a rather nice email... and i wasn't going to include it in the blog, but when you compare to it what I got a few days later, it shows what kind of emails I am guessing I am going to get.

I assume this is from someone called Nick. So Nick, this is your 5 minutes (at the moment, cos you haven't replied) of fame

Hi there. Sorry I haven't been in touch, but I've got this modelling job, y'know, and it all got a bit out of hand. I've been working with a guy called Phil on next years traffic light poses, and also a lovely girl(?) called Stevedave for some lavotory doors... just all been go, go, go these past months. Anyway, I'm fine, I'm staying with Nick in Rutland Street and he's feeding me regularly.

I'll see you soon... Steve

what do you reply to that.... well this.

HELLO STEVE,

Nice to hear from you, being honest, was getting a bit worried about thee. I take it you must have seen one of my lost signs, or someone wearing a sticker about finding you, so glad my campaign seems to be working.

Who's this chap your staying with then? Glad he seems to have taken you under his wing. To let him know how important you are to me take him to look at www.photosofonelosthousemate.blogspot.com If he wants he can get involved too, and that would be awesome.

Did I mention there are prizes for the best photo of someone with you steve? If you check out www.lettersofonelosthousemate.blogspot.com all should be revealed on that front.

Nice to hear from you mate. Talk again soon I guess, and hope your new found friend gets involved

Have a nice day

John

Polite, and informative, I think you will agree.

Amongst all of this Karl sent me another photo, but it wasn't quite what i was looking for. Good effort though. I must add though that the email did suggest he was playing by the rules

I told my mail-order bride in Richmond VA, usa about your art project. She has sent me this to past on to you! she works for a income tax agency that has steve in the logo hope it makes the blog. K

STUPID Blog won't let me post photos at the mo... will fix it soon

My First Tom....

2005-10-19T19:23:00.000Z

This very same night that i had my newsletter, my second entrant and a ham sandwich a very special thing happened too.

I met my first MSN add.

Now when I first set all this up, I didnt really expect anyone to add me to MSN.

But someone did, and his name was and is Tom

Tom is a very nice bloke, just so everyone in the world knows. We had a decent conversation about how he found the address, what i'm up to and things I probably should be doing. Maybe as well Tom will become an entrant.

Either way Tom has been immortalised for being the first MSN add and now all my Adds shall now be known as 'Tom's'

Thanks for starting something else really cool....

Now for all of your reading pleasure, here is the first ever MSN conversation with Tom and onelosthousemate

Please note my politeness, deludedness at the end, and the exact moment Tom realises i'm not a woman.

Tom says:
hey!

Mr A Friend says:
hello?

Tom says:
hey

Tom says:
how you doing?

Mr A Friend says:
i wasnt expecting anyone to have me on msn

Mr A Friend says:
do i know a Tom?

Tom says:
nope, you had your email addess written on your bag and i saw it somewhere so i remembered it and added you haha

Mr A Friend says:
my flyer?

Tom says:
twas a sticker on your bag

Mr A Friend says:
oh you mean.... Hello, I am nice. you should be too!

Tom says:
yeah!

Tom says:
that was it

Mr A Friend says:
your not a friend of Tony are you?

Tom says:
not that i know of

Mr A Friend says:
Sorry, i'm in a slight state of shock that one of my stickers has actually worked

Mr A Friend says:
Nice to meet you Tom. There i'm being far more polite now

Tom says:
yup

Tom says:
hehe

Tom says:
you too

Tom says:
soooo who are you?

Mr A Friend says:
well, my stickers are all part of my flyer, which you'll receive in a minute, and what i'm trying to get people to do is take photos of themselves with signs that have people on them and send them to this address like the one of me ----> there is a grand prize as well for the best

Mr A Friend says:
and two websites if you really want to know more

Tom says:
ah right

Tom says:
yeah i know where to go ^_^

Mr A Friend says:
where were you when you saw the sticker?

Tom says:
in the cornish pasty shop

Tom says:
some girl had it on her bag

Mr A Friend says:
in the city centre?

Tom says:
yup

Mr A Friend says:
of leicester?

Tom says:
yes

Onelosthousemate says:
thats amazing!

Tom says:
dont tell me your bloody spanish or something? haha

Onelosthousemate says:
CONGRATULATIONS ON BEING THE FIRST ONELOSTHOUSEMATE ADDY

Onelosthousemate says:
i'm english

Tom says:
ill get a photo tomorow!

Onelosthousemate says:
reallly?

Tom says:
yup

Onelosthousemate says:
you'll be the second entrant

Tom says:
ill get some other people to as well

Onelosthousemate says:
that would be awesome

Onelosthousemate says:
you want the website links?

Tom says:
sure

Onelosthousemate says:
www.photosofonelosthousemate.blogspot.com this is all the photos and then there is www.lettersofonelosthousemate.blogspot.com which is all about how i get the prizes.

Onelosthousemate says:
feel free to leave a comment

Tom says:
sure

Onelosthousemate says:
this is really weird

Onelosthousemate says:
but cool

Onelosthousemate says:
thank you for being curious enough to add me

Tom says:
thats alright

Onelosthousemate says:
cool

Onelosthousemate says:
I guess i should send you the newsletter that i just sent out to as many people as possible to try and get them into it

Onelosthousemate says:
im not too good on promotion

Onelosthousemate says:
as shown in my poor quality stickers, shit flyer, and flyering abilities

Tom says:
hehe

Tom says:
you just need some high contrast posters/flyers/stickers

Onelosthousemate says:
i can't afford them

Onelosthousemate says:
which is why everything is so bog standard

Tom says:
copy shops

Tom says:
cartridge express in leicester

Tom says:
shite cheap

Tom says:
for printing

Onelosthousemate says:
thats what i've been doing

Tom says:
cheapest by miles

Tom says:
they were 15x cheaper than other places when i got some printing done!!

Onelosthousemate says:
got my next flyer ready which has my face twatted all over it, but got about 700 to shift at the mo of the first one

Tom says:
lol

Tom says:
right, tomorrow ill go get an action shot with steve!

Tom says:
then

Tom says:
ill see if i can get some advertising

Tom says:
haha truthfully i added this because the girl who had the sticker on her bag was hot lmao

Tom says:
but anyway

Onelosthousemate says:
she was? I don't give out flyers to girls unless i know them cos they scare the shit out of me being honest

Onelosthousemate says:
so i might know her

Onelosthousemate says:
unless i gave her it whilst i was drunk

Tom says:
maybe

Tom says:
um

Tom says:
shes

Tom says:
maybe 5'10

Onelosthousemate says:
which is a possibility

Tom says:
lip ring

Tom says:
thats all i remember

Tom says:
and she had a cornish pasty a few days ago haha

Onelosthousemate says:
right, il ask around tomorrow. 5'10 and a lip ring... maybe 5'4 downwards but not 5'10

Tom says:
haha

Tom says:
ok i suck on height

Tom says:
any height

Tom says:
she had hair, i know that

Onelosthousemate says:
excellent

Onelosthousemate says:
my housemates are all very impressed with the fact you are my first addy

Onelosthousemate says:
sorry im not a fit girl

Tom says:
meh, its all good

Onelosthousemate says:
Well, I guess I should make some more stickers before i go to bed now that i know at least one has worked

Tom says:
hehe, how do you make them?

Onelosthousemate says:
i bought typewritter stickers and a rubber stamp maker

Onelosthousemate says:
so far our chat has cost me about 20 pounds, but there may be more toms out there

Onelosthousemate says:
if u see what i mean

Tom says:
yup

Onelosthousemate says:
oh shit i just got an email

Onelosthousemate says:
its all happening tonight

Onelosthousemate says:
did u get mine

Tom says:
woo

Tom says:
yeah idid

Onelosthousemate says:
woo.... just got my second entrant

Tom says:
woo

Onelosthousemate says:
two months, two entrants

Onelosthousemate says:
just a shame i know him

Tom says:
hehe

Tom says:
so...if i use my powers of magicalness to get you lots of entrants, do i get anything special ^_^

Onelosthousemate says:
Well, if it ends up being the best photo, you'll win the overall prize

Onelosthousemate says:
I should make u something though for being the first outsider to be involved

Onelosthousemate says:
hmm

Onelosthousemate says:
i'll have a think

Tom says:
cool

Onelosthousemate says:
it won't be too expensive or well made. But it will be limited edition!

Tom says:
woo!

Onelosthousemate says:
got any kind of idea of what u think u deserve

Tom says:
bentley coninental GT should do it

Tom says:
blue

Tom says:
red leather

Onelosthousemate says:
haha

Onelosthousemate says:
i was thinking of something which wouldn't break the pound mark

Onelosthousemate says:
this will defo be a big thing on my website

Onelosthousemate says:
and imagine if this does get big, you'll be the first. BOOKS, VIDEO'S SHOWS yes im being deluded. But you have the privilage.

Onelosthousemate says:
like that weird advert

Tom says:
woo!

Onelosthousemate says:
thats the best i can offer really

Onelosthousemate says:
i should get a few stickers to you though

Tom says:
meh its cool

Onelosthousemate says:
sorry i just want to make sure... by city i mean leicester not london

Tom says:
yarr im in leicester

Tom says:
right im out

Onelosthousemate says:
ok

Tom says:
later dude

Onelosthousemate says:
can i keep a copy of this chat

Tom says:
yeah

Onelosthousemate says:
just to prove it was real when i come to write about it

Tom says:
hehe

Tom says:
sure

Onelosthousemate says:
excellent

Onelosthousemate says:
have a good day tomorrow

Tom says:
you too

Onelosthousemate says:
you are now a onelostfriend

Tom says:
=D

Whats that done to the map.... ???

2005-10-19T18:15:00.000Z

Well, i'll tell you what that has done to the map

Not much, because i'm struggling again geographywise.

My Teacher would have been disgusted with me.

Anyway, here once again for your viewing pleasure is my lovely map.

Enjoy

A response from onelostnewsletter.

2005-10-19T18:09:00.000Z

So about an hour after I've sent off my first newsletter to the world, I get a SECOND entrant.

This is no longer a one horse race. It is an actual competition of some quality.

Our next entrant is one Mr Karl S**********a, i'm assuming he was so close to the camera he didn't want to be identified, so i'll keep his full name a secret to and respect his wishes.

Karl also writes the following in his email

"I've been kidnapped by Libarian Terrorists! They've locked me in a manky room (which looks a lot like a shitty study room at brighton uni) with only a computer. I have to use the computer to transfer billions of dollars into there nuclear weapons testing account. If I don't, they kill me! I only have steve to keep me company! And I think he's trying to give me a clue as to how to escape, but i'm not quite sure yet... Help me."

The librarian terrorists were unavailable for comment.

Thank you Karl for your kind entry. You are now one of the crew!

The First Newsletter, just incase you missed it!

2005-10-19T18:00:00.000Z

Hello and welcome to the first onelosthousemate update.

If you are reading this congratulations, somehow you have ended up on the onelosthousemate mailing list. This can happen via a number of reasons.

1. You have emailed me and I have just added you to my list.

2. You know the other John Kirby and he has added you to the list.

3. I have a wrong email address and this is a mistake.

Anyway, here me out.

First of all a big pat on the back to Lucy Stevens, who in association with 'Massive Hands' Simon became the first entrant to onelosthousemate. But the game is not up yet, I still need people emailing me those photos. Maybe trawl your old albums or go out tomorrow and take some photos. To help out, if you're really stuck, email me and i'll send you a copy of my flyer. If you really want, ask for some to print and join the cause. Positions are currently available in the onelosthousemate office, unfortunately all voluntary work, but i'll fit you in and make you one of the onelostfamily.

IN OTHER NEWS. The prize has been set. EVERYTHING i receive from my letters will go towards the prize. So far it stands at a crystal whisky glass, 5 air fresheners and a guide to advertisements and signs. But what if i get £500,000 pounds through the post. You don't want to miss out do you.

If you're really not sure whats going on first visit

www.photosofonelosthousemate.blogspot.com

and then go to

www.lettersofonelosthousemate.blogspot.com

that should fill you in.

Please feel free to forward this to everyone, I REALLY DO NEED YOUR HELP.

KEEP IT LOST.

John (MR ONELOSTHOUSEMATE)

The Trouble with Mapage.

2005-10-13T07:08:00.000Z

Yes mapage is a major problem these days. I want to tell the world where chelsea is on a map, but google just doesn't cut it that well and google earth makes my computer spaz so much anyone would think i've been rubbing speed into the hard drive. Upon looking for Chelsea, (yes I know its in london) I found countless underground maps, a nice one just pointing to the whole of britain, and this... which came up everytime, now I'm not stupid, but this is definitely not a map of britain or chelsea.

That my good friend is a cat in a hat, and a dress next to an old record player!

What would people think of me if my map ended up looking like that with a big arrow pointing towards it saying chelsea!?

Not only would people think i was mad, but it would then imply that Lucy somewhere along the line went to a small cat and found some road signs to take photos of with her boyfriend.

Well i cannot be fooled by a cat, even if its in a hat and a dress.

This is my updated map... I've guessed where chelsea is, being honest I think its a better attempt then the one above.

Please note the time and effort it took me to colour in the sea, was like being back in GCSE Geography

3rd of October 2005.... A BREAKTHROUGH.

2005-10-12T16:57:00.000Z

So getting more up to date now, and that meaning that my writing will be more cohereant, I had done a hell of alot of flyering, a hell of alot of talking, a hell of a lot of stickering and sticker making, but I wasn't getting much on the email front.

It got round to the 3rd of October when I checked my emails next after the flyerthon. and there it was

1 message waiting

Now before I had Mickkkkkky and Hotmail teasing me. As well as countless send backs on the send out front, so I was naturally well aware that this could be another let down.

So I opened it cautiously, but it wasn't from either Mickkkkkky or Hotmail it was Lucy, my gallery chum, and the heading was "Hurrah! At last!"

This was very promising.

So I read on....

Hello John,

Went to London yday and came up with the goods!

Got 2 pics of Si next to Steve and went to exh at Chelsea and someone had kinda done your idea with street signs- see your an artist and you dont even know it!

xx Lucy xx

I had now entered the world of getting one person involved. I was no longer a onelostvirgin.

Lucy had popped my cherry, and the photos were great.

I was sooo happy. And that was just about when I decided to set up the blog of what was going on.

Just look at these Awesome Photos

SO ENTRANT NUMBER ONE

SIMON'S FACE, LUCYS CAMERA - CHELSEA

(please note Simon's massive hands)

Always look on the Bright (SODJE!) side of life

2005-10-11T20:55:00.000Z

So I had these evil, evil women weaving their own evilness into an oblivion, but I was JOHN KIRBY, Master of the Universe. Well if the universe entirely consisted of me flyering. I was a flyering king. Everyone was taking stuff off me. Gateway flyers, onelosthousemate flyers, stickers... Yes stickers.

By now I had decided that students were only interested in free stuff. So I bought 250 stickers and made around 30 via the gift of my own fair hands.

Stupidly I didnt keep any of these limited edition pieces. And I soon bought my own printing machine and I am now off in the sticker stakes.

After a good hard session flyering, I inspected the damage Revolution had incured on our environment. The Following photo is of my good friend Tony, with said flyers. Please note the poor lads look in his eye. He doesn't like Vodka let alone love it. Next time you flyer revolution won't you please think of the children.

Flyering... a job for gypo's and Hobo's?

2005-10-10T21:11:00.000Z

So, I had alot of trouble handing out flyers, but in my defence i would like to add that i am now in my second batch of flyers.

For all those who read the flyer and consequently are now reading this, thank you, I LOVE YOU... BUT WHY HAVEN'T YOU EMAILED ME???

There were many a person I met throughout those days, some of them were lovely, particular note goes out to the woman from Mosh who wore her sticker (yes I now have stickers) the last three days of the freshers week, it made me very proud.

There were however some very evil people out there throughout this time.

To the random asian man who called me sad... shame on you.

To the person who said he would go home and email me... and never did.... shame on you

TO THE REVOLUTION WOMEN...... I PURE HATE YOU

these women were horrible. I told them all about my precious project and they threw my flyer on the floor after they said they were interested.

They were picky in who they flyered, mainly blonde young men. They smoked, were inward, unhappy, and threw there own flyers on the floor, shame on them. I don't often take such a harsh view on people in life and want to see the good side of people, but these people had no good side, because they were and are parasites.

The following images you may find distressing...

Now these women were very nasty, read my letter of complaint to the head of revolution that i wrote on my other site. I went there straight after I had finished. And that was the other strange thing, I was right next to these people and after seeing their moody faces they were quite happy to see my chirpy face on the other side.

Mickkkkkky Test The Water...AGAIN!

2005-10-10T21:07:00.000Z

Not content with sending me one fakelosthousemate photo, Mickkkkkky McGuigan decides to send me another photo, taunting me with the fact that i am still yet to find any such able body to email me

please note that in this story the number of k's in mickkkkkky's name MAY be exhadurated in order to protect his identity

accompanying the photo Mickkkkkky wrote

that crazy Steve!! What is he up to now??

Mickkkkkky test the water.

2005-10-07T20:28:00.000Z

Imagine what its like to be the most unpopular person in the world

If you can't, set up a email account, tell everyone about the address that you can't shake a stick at, and then check your account every day. The only emails you receive are from hotmail, and they come about once a month. It is truly depressing.

It wasn't a secret that no one was replying either.

It was a selling point, be the first person to ever email me. I'd started flyering now at freshers week and was using these as target lines

"BE THE FIRST PERSON EVER TO EMAIL ME"

"MAKE AN OLD MAN HAPPY"

"DO YOU WANT A FRIEND FOR LIFE"

"GUARANTEED HAPPINESS FOR LIFE... FOR ME"

"HAVE YOU SEEN THIS MAN"

anything i could think of to get someone to reply to me.

Then on the 22nd of september, i came home and checked my mail, as i always do, and there it was....

ONE UNREAD MAIL....

I was in, someone had replied! I clicked to continue....

shit it was an email from Mikkkkkky. He wasn't sending me a photo of him either, he was asking for where the photo of him with chas and dave was.

He was however very nice and polite, and i can recommend receiving an email from him.

It wasnt all doom and gloom though. He ended his email....

Also, here is some geezer in a Vodafone shop in Colchester. Doesn't really count as someone with Steve, but at least it wont just be your email sitting in your inbox!!
Mickkkkkky

and true to his word, there he was...

An update....

2005-10-05T09:33:00.000Z

Now i know what you're thinking....

You're thinking John, you've been to Croydon, Luton and Derby, some of the foremost beautiful towns in Britain, but where are they on a map

A brief note.

2005-10-04T18:29:00.000Z

It was actually after Chas and Dave, as i'm still wearing the shirt I wore the day before, my apologies for throwing the whole continuity of the blog into disripute.

Derby B & Q....

2005-10-04T18:20:00.000Z

Straight from coming back after Chas and Dave, or The Ashes, I can't remember now, I am assuming this to be either through tiredness or hungoverness we went to B & Q in Derby for various reasons... now i'll confess, yes someone did buy me tiny people as a present and they are now on my door, but I wasn't expecting a sign as good as the one I saw to be just by the door.

I will say no more. Just enjoy this photo

Luton, Croydon, and the third day of the last test Vs Austrailia!

2005-10-04T17:49:00.000Z

The very next week, I made the trip down to London with Nic because we had tickets to go and watch the saturday of the test match vs Austrailia.

Now any other year before this one i would have quite happily gone to london (well maybe not happily) gone to the cricket and loved it and come back, no biggy.

But Luton and Croydon was awash with Steves, and I was intent on getting all of them that I cast my eye over.

During the rest of the time many strange things happened. One night I couldn't eat chicken. One man started begging even though he blatently wasnt homeless. Ron, who was incharge of the coach told me that I was a complainer after seeing my backlog of around twenty letters I had written by that time. See www.lettersofonelosthousemate.blogspot.com and then after the cricket I had my photo taken with the pink panther, Sylvester and Sir Bobby Robson.

By the way, we didn't see much cricket, because of the damn english weather, but we were definitely closer to winning by the time of the end of play. I also had my Barmy Army T-shirt made, with no.4 Sodje on the back.

So here they are, my next photos of me. There is one of Nic, but I think i'll have to ask her if I can put it on here before I do, after all you know what women are like. (and if your homosexual, you know what your other half is like)

Also see if you can tell the exact moment someone bought me a england fleece.

A First update....

2005-10-03T23:18:00.000Z

I had struck in Newport Pagnell, and I feel the need to use a map to prove it, so here it is, Newport Pagnell ish as indicated by the ridiculously small dot on the map, click to enlarge. Anyone who wants proof i met Chas and Dave email me... i have a signed copy of their album now, and i promise you it will never see the light of ebay

Newport Pagnell, where every buddy young artist goes for inspirado

2005-10-03T22:45:00.000Z

Who would have thought it?

Newport Pagnell....

I love Newport Pagnell, armed with a camera and my own wit, I made my first 'Steve' photos.

It was great, he was here, he was there, he was quite literally everywhere, and all I had to do was take a few photos and enjoy the rest of my night, so I did and these are the results.

The first one I found after relieving myself was the one of Steve and his close family. Just look how happy i am! Think to yourself, that could be me, i know it is me but it could be you! sending me a photo. the next was blind steve with a stick, or steve with a really shit golf club. last but not least, steve being a tidy bastard and putting his litter in the bin.

For these reasons alone I loved my brief stay in Newport Pagnell, I had no idea what is there, apart from a juicer, there were sooo many old people but it was almost as good as meeting chas and dave later that night.

later in the week, i emailed myself the photos out of pure joy, and to make sure the account was actually working.

you'll be glad to know it was.

The rise of the flyer....

2005-10-03T21:52:00.000Z

Well about 20 odd days into my venture i realised the reason why no one was really replying to me might be to the way in which my flyers were constructed. Quite frankly they were shit. Cheap, but very very shit.

So I went from wax crayons on Karl's cast off paper, to designing a flyer, which I would get printed at the lovely store on Hinckley Road, although the lady in there isnt very nice but i'll explain that later.

I needed something which would say pretty much everything that I needed, and I could make it into a poster as well.

After a while of awkwardly shifting things around on word, I had come up with my flyer. The next day, i took them down to the printers, and for the tidy sum of 3 pounds, i had 400 flyers, now i all had to do was flyer them, and spread the word even further.

Flyer, flyer flyer, and flyer some more.

2005-10-03T19:57:00.000Z

In fairness to myself, between when they were made, and the beginning of september, my flyering went fairly well, and people were getting in the know. Housemates Mikkkkkky, Shaun, Karl, Paddy and Alan getting in on the act, spreading the word at both work and during playtime.

Mike actually took some out on a rather long night in Mosh, and I think all he got was harrassed as a nutter for the night. Still a big hand and mention for trying to spread the word in Mosh. I'll never forget the night either we asked just about everyone in Fan Club if they were Gary, it was soooo hard to get a taxi back that night, but we did in the end, with a man from Birstall, called.... Gary.

Posters went up at SGP, The City Gallery. Flyers went everywhere, from friends to friends of friends to friends of friends of friends, to people we didn't really like. Customers at the pub weren't safe. Flyers to went up in the Gateway Freehouse. I was even carrying around these bad boys to target anyone.

It wouldn't be until the end of september that i would really go for it on the flyering front.

But until then I was fairly content in all the promises friends had made, to all the promises friends of friends had made. and to all the promises friends of friends of friends had made.

It was time to take a break. Time to get away from everything onelosthousemateness.

In short it was time to go back to Margate and see Chas and Dave.

Just for the record....

2005-10-03T19:11:00.000Z

MFC's first game at Hartsdown park was a dream. Everyone was on top form. The people who worked in the shop, were very nice and polite, selling just about anything in the world that had even previously touched a MFC player. Fun was had by all, before, during and after the big game, and over 1200 turned up to watch Margate win 1-0 due to a Leon Braithwaite strike.

After the game things got a bit messy in, many thanks to Q-bar and the belgian bar. I even didn't take out my flyers that night, I had a night off.

And because this site is all about the photo's here is a photo of me and all my MFC supporting chums, awaiting the second half from the Coffin End.

If at first you don't succeed, go to Thurrock.

2005-10-03T16:53:00.000Z

So by now I had spent alot of time sitting around, talking about how my first entrant was just around the corner and waiting, and nothing really coming through to me.

So what a better excuse to do a bit more stealth flyering but with a trip down to margate to see the might MFC's first home game in three years?

Anyway, you may or may not know but it is a scientific fact that everyone in their lifetime from Londoners to Liberian girls stops at least once in their lifetime at Thurrock service station. I have been there so many times, I know most of the news which is stuck on the broken tv, and can even tell you what used to be in the big gaping hole downstairs.

So where better to leave a few flyers? Well in short the answer is nowhere.

So here are photos, one in the toilet, one on a table and one outside, the nice young man is my good friend Karl, chipping in and helping a cause.

(please note that for privacy reasons, some names I will tell you I have changed but really it is actually their name)

Its a miracle.... well kind of

2005-09-29T21:40:00.000Z

Posting working again now, so please enjoy the fruits of my loins....

Posters around the great city of Leicester.

2005-09-29T08:45:00.000Z

To maximise my potential to get an email i picked on places where I thought I was bound to get some response be it positive or negative.

First of all on a main road with lots of shops (and outside a police station!), outside two pubs, and outside The City Gallery!

I waited for a whole day, until I did my poll of how well I was getting noticed.

Even though the sign had been outside the gallery for two days before I said anything, no-one had noticed the sign up.

So I pointed it out to people, and waited a bit more. I'm sure it was a mere game of patience before curiosity got the better of someone.

Frustratingly I've got this far into updating my blog, and it won't let me add anymore photos at the moment, so here is the only one that loaded... onelosthousemate@hinckleyroad.leicester!

others will follow

Where it all began...

2005-09-28T18:34:00.000Z

A little over a month ago I started putting up wax crayon signs saying that I had "Lost my housemate" not really knowing why, apart from a nice man had put on the lampost outside my house that he had lost his keys and I wanted to join in with the fun.

I set up an email address and waited for someone to email me, but nothing ever came.

I posted a few more posters around Leicester City, on a main road, outside two pubs, and outside a gallery... but still nothing.

This was probably because of the ridiculous idea that someone could actually loose a blue eyed housemate called Steve.

I am now over a month into my quest to find Steve, and with 600 flyers, posters and emails, my trek I feel is only just beginning.